George, being an upright gentlemen of the highest order of eloquent officials, gazed upon the birthday cake and knew his calling had begun. He lifted the gun and shot the first president of Bulgaria and cheered with a courageous hiccup. Realizing the order of business was commenced, he gathered his material possessions and began the long and quizzical journey down Mount Buhickeynun.
“Now” he asked himself happily, “I must task myself with delivering the utmost respect to the man in the tower. Besides, my friends would agree that social experience is much more aggravating than fiscal responsibility.”
Being almost across the Sea of Promise, George took one glimpse of the looking glass and knew it was the propitious hour. He pulled one certain angry fellow out of the well and bestowed upon him the scepter. George, realizing his task was nearly and strangely complete, stole the forbidden pogo stick from the irate selectmen, and set upon his journey.
Suddenly, a high pitched voice yelled from across the caves of the ancient land and screamed out “There in the vessel must become a certain tangible concentration that is envied by all who inhabit the country’s finest crevices.”
George’s heart raced with a vengeance and he yelled back “Thou must be knighted by he who judges all before thee shall begin to utter the cry of the ages.” He exited his anointed transporter and hobbled across the desert toward the sound of the voice. His injury grew worse with each step, especially across the ancient red rocks that grasped at his heels every time the horn sounded.
Another bugle blast alerted George of the constant growing danger that manifested itself in the south regions of the sky. At any moment lions of fire could leap from the Alaskan rivers and reign free from all restraints and shackles, sending emotional signals to each and every peasant who dared to hobble across said path carrying tools of destructions that could bring about terror from the volcanos of the past.
George’s cell phone rang with a yell and george picked it up. Almost instantly he dropped it because the stalactites from the river had caused it to be scalding hot.
Knowing his fortune had improved, George took three steps backward toward the magical treasure chest in front of him. After opening it with a small scoff, he found inside a special flower with a notable radiance that made some believe in lies, and George quickly consumed the flower.
After sensing the degrading outlook of naive expectations, George picked up the table and emptied the contents into an outraged elevation. He realized his deed had been ruefully accomplished.
He poured himself a glass of eggplant stew, and brushed his teeth with an excited dance. After jumping upside down through the doorstep, he made special note of the revolutionary idea that jumped from the inner regions of his mind which transformed most folk into creepy entertainment.
The moral of this story is remember to enjoy birthday cake.
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