Wednesday, June 1, 2011

No Summer Break?

So, the school year is almost out, FINALLY.  What would happen if there were no summer break? What would be the consequences?

Well, first of all, the stress rate would go way up.  Kids NEED a break from school, it is scientifically proven.  Kids would become more stressed and their blood pressure would go up.  The stress would turn them into pale hunchbacked Gollum creatures who sat on the floor yelling all day.  Eventually all the work would cause children to have nervous breakdowns and burn their homework.

Then, the kids would start rioting in the streets with pitchforks and torches, torching buildings and smashing windows with rocks.  They would ultimately reach the school and burn it to the ground.  But the children would not be satisfied.  After destroying the school, they would burn their teachers in effigy while chanting. 

The children would commit acts of terror and genocide in all major cities, eventually beginning a nuclear war.  Wars would break out between nations.  Prisoners would escape from jails.  The moon would fall to Earth, leading Earth to collide with Venus.  The impact would be so large that the gravitational balance of the universe would be upset, and all planets would fly into the sun. 

Teachers and Parents, unless you want to destroy the entire solar system, give us a long summer break... fast.


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